ummm...random title
i'm bored

I wanted to update my journal so here you go.

I'm a senior

I have to get a 4.0 to get priorities left and right.

Have to learn chinese... lol jk

school school school
pictures pictures school
sleep sleep wake shower school
WEEKEND Sleep Sleep Sleep
wake lazy sleep school
pictures martial arts
pictures
die

ha MY AGENDA basically

Have you ever felt so much for someone, and even if your with your other friends, you constantly remember certain things about some place that reminds them of you.
Well that place for me is music.
And that someone is Nic.
My love.
But you guys already knew that.
Sometimes I just want to sing to him, make up a song about how much I love him, but I try and I can never find the Perfect not even normal words that could tell him that.
I can tell you guys he has been in my dreams ever since I met him.
So I can truly say I love him conscious or in my subconscious.
LOL.
Even if he wasn't the main character in my dream.
He was there being himself.
It's so funny I always am worried that he would cheat on me and I can't understand why.
I mean he hasn't and I know he won't
maybe it's just a female thing XD.
I can't think of being without him. Which is probably selfish, because I don't want him to feel obligated to stay with me if he doesn't feel it anymore. But I find myself almost trying to find other guy's attractive, and it never happens.
Because he has altered my thinking, the way I live to a point where I don't even desire to like any other guy or to find them attractive in a sexual way.
I may not even have lived long enough to KNOW or EXPIERIENCE true love that last's forever.
But how many people have said they were truly in "love" and been divorced or end up hating each other's guts?
I think when you truly loves someone you can't put words to it, you can't exactly say why you love them but you remember stuff they have done with them, or you remember characteristics about them EXAMPLE:he's so nice, he always opens doors for me
Whatever, but it's not just :money: or :nice personality:
The list goes on and on and on and on.
And i'm not saying that's the case with everyone.
I just feel so in love with him.
i'm absolutely intoxicated with his warm hugs and kisses.
There trance-starting and wonderful and special.
Each one.
Different.
But meaningful!
He's so different from me and yet I find myself always smiling and laughing and absolutely in a trance/spaced-off/love spell
that's amazing
:]
I wish everyone could feel this way.
It's like ecstasy.
I always want to be surrounded by him.
I sadly cannot even sleep when I don't call him and say goodnight, or hear him before I go to sleep.
Which I think is just a bit selfish because he can't always do that.
But it's me.


Maybe people will understand this ,
maybe they will think
it won't last.
But whatever the case,
Whatever you opinion is
I'm right and you can't influence me to believe you because your not the one expieriencing it.
Your not the one who slept on a roof with him while it was raining
and had sex with him that same night and then fell asleep in his arms.
Whispering I love you, and having the greateset sleep ever.
And then he walks you all the way home because he loves you.
at 7:00 am
And your not the one who made him a wooden heart with your name in it for his b-day.
And he loved it, he said it was the best present ever
:] which in turn makes me happy.
And your not the one who was nuzzled up with him under the stars watching them and talking. And then a shooting star passes. My 1st shooting star
:]
Your not the one who walked with him on the beach at night and raced along the shore line and played tag and almost got thrown in the freezing water but instead I was gently placed on the sand and kissed passionatly. <3
But i can honestly say I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
But if you care to "prove" me wrong.
try me.
I'll be waiting
xoxox
[ Kat ]

that's my online name
because perverts are scary
:]
meow

well no matter how many times I can watch a beautiful sunset I never cease to be amazed

and everything in life is perfect
Humans are perfect
were just in denial

dissapointment.....
i'm feeling slightly betrayed...
well now you may be asking yourself WHAT you do now
you never lie to me again
especially when I'm right behind you
listening to your scheme.
I can't..I CANNOT believe you
I really thought ALL those times when you made up excuses for me not hanging with you
were real
BUT i think there not..
I truly know who you like better
and thats just great
because I WAS your best friend
But now I really don't know where I stand in your life

before him after her
after them or maybe not at all
that's ok
I get it now

OK so i was tagged by
so here it goes

1. My number one petpeeve is when I ask people to use there phone and they say "why dont you use the payphone"?....and in my head im like " if i had money for the payphone would I be asking you??
2. I am in complete love with my boyfriend <3 FEB 25,2008 <3
3. I like mindgames especially the escape games, or the point and click games.
4. My best girl friend is
5. I love MUSIC [ DIR EN GREY at the moment]
6. My favorite color is orange
7. My favorite animals are bats, armadillos, and snails <3
8. I love the moon and the stars.
9. I HATE when people are dissapointed in me
10. I like creating and doing stuff with my hands
(painting, balloon dart thing, sculpting, drawing)